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Burning Hearts

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The Gift of Suffering IV – Suffering Develops Empathy

The problem of suffering is one of the biggest human problems people face. We struggle with the problem both intellectually and emotionally. Suffering is a problem emotionally because we all experience it, and we know and love people who experience it in profound ways. It brings us pain to see those we love go through deep and protracted pain. The intellectual problem of suffering assaults us with the nagging question concerning why suffering happened to me or a loved one, but more acutely with questions of why anyone suffers. Why does suffering have to be such a pervasive reality in our world? There are no easy answers to the intellectual or emotional questions we grapple with, but we find satisfying answers in the Bible. We find God’s answers. We can sum up the Bible’s answer to the questions of suffering with the simple statement, “Suffering is not for nothing.” Though it often feels purposeless, suffering has a purpose in the plan of God. We read in Philippians 1:29, “For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ, you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake.” We notice in this verse that suffering is a gift from God, but also that when the gift of suffering fulfills its purpose, it is for the sake of Christ. It advances his gospel and glorifies his name. This is the fourth of six articles on how suffering really is a gift from God. In this study, we explore the biblical teaching that suffering develops empathy.

Previous Articles in SeriesThe Gift of Suffering I – The Gift of Suffering IIThe Gift of Suffering III

Empathy is a beautiful and powerful character trait that people should have but especially believers in Jesus Christ. Basically, empathy means to enter into another’s pain, to share in it, and to try to understand it. Usually, empathetic people have some shared experience that can serve as a basis for understanding the other person’s pain. Not that we can fully understand what someone else is going through, but we can have some basis of understanding because we’ve experienced something similar. The golden rule given by Jesus, “Do unto others as you would have them do to you,” is a call to empathy. Some people are naturally more empathetic than others, but we all can show empathy and grow in our capacity to try to understand another person’s suffering.

It is easy to see how experiencing suffering ourselves can develop empathy for the suffering of others. As we suffer and know the pain of suffering, we can more easily appreciate what another person is facing.  We find this attitude expressed in 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” Paul praises God for the comfort we believers in Jesus Christ receive from the Father when we suffer. In suffering, we desperately need comfort. God is called the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort. God the Father seeks to bring comfort to his suffering children. He is merciful and compassionate to us in our struggles, whether they be physical, emotional, or spiritual, or whether they are self-induced or undeserved. The comfort God brings us can come directly from God through the Word of God, prayer, and the Holy Spirit, or it can come from God through another person with an empathetic and compassionate heart. It is stated here in our passage that one reason we suffer and receive comfort from God is so that we can be an instrument of God to bring comfort to another.

As we navigate through the pain of our own suffering by the presence and power of God, it develops the empathy in our hearts that God can use to comfort others who face suffering in their lives. When we say suffering develops empathy, we mean it is a process. Suffering over time brings about God’s desired results of empathy. But we mustn’t think that just because we suffer, we’re developing empathy. Suffering can have two results in our lives. It can either make us bitter or better. It all depends on whether we react or respond to the suffering we experience.

It is easy to react or recoil, at least initially, to pain in our lives, especially when the pain is great. We do not like suffering and want it to end as soon as possible. But that natural aversion to suffering can lead us down the path of bitterness. The path of bitterness is the path of misery. The pain of bitterness can actually be greater than the pain of the suffering that led to the bitterness. Bitterness is a hole we dig in our hearts that can be so deep that it’s hard to get out. We can deal with bitterness or the temptation to bitterness by realizing and trusting some things about God. First, we can realize and trust that God is in control of the world and our lives. Our suffering does not take Him by surprise. He saw it coming, and He allowed it to happen. He has a purpose in it. Second, we can realize and trust that God is infinitely wise. He knows all the possibilities and what is best for us. And thirdly, we can realize and trust that God loves us. God’s love for us leads Him to do what we need in our lives. It’s often hard to trust God in the grip of suffering, but we must. God is doing something amazing inside us for His kingdom and glory. One of those things God is doing is that through our suffering, He is developing empathy in our hearts. There is someone out there who will be suffering in the future. They desperately need someone to come alongside them and try to understand their feelings, even if they don’t understand them themselves. You can be that person if you respond to the suffering in your life, and allow God to develop empathy in your heart through that suffering you’re struggling with now. What you’re going through has a purpose in God’s plan.

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